As a single man that is ready to settle down and start the journey to finding the one, there are a few things that need to be put in check, there are certain things that need to be worked on. Finding one as a man can be daunting. There are certain things you need to be aware of:
Set aside your ego
If you are ready to hang the coat of being a bachelor, then you need to start by setting aside your ego because, in a relationship of two, there can be disagreements, and you need to have the heart to learn from the other and be able to accept yourself regardless. To be a man ready to have the one and settle down, you need to know to compromise, meaning getting what can be changed and what cannot be changed.
Step out of your way
To be able to say that you are ready to find the one, you need to be able to accommodate other people in your life, plans, and future. You need to step out of your comfort zone and be that person for your “the one.”
To accommodate someone else Is being comfortable being with another person in your space means running your decisions about the minor things with someone, that way, you will be ready to face what comes with having a wife.
Never play games
On your way in finding the one, yes you will be filled with fear, fear if you will find the one or not, one thing is for sure, you need to be ready to face rejections by the girl you like so much, you are prone to a hundred mini heartbreaks, but you know what, The best husbands are the ones who know how much it hurts to love.
What am I saying? do not play games in the hopes that you do not get heartBroken. You have to put your heart out and be ready for all the insults, rejections, and spiteful things you will experience because all of this is just part of the journey to finding the one.
As much as you have to be vulnerable, it is essential to realize that other people like to look for single guys and have fun with them, which means games can be played, so you need to be smart enough to realize who is playing you isn’t.
Never judge either yourself or the other person as right or wrong, good or bad.
As you step in the light of looking for a lifelong partner, it is essential never to judge the other person. It’s almost impossible to know someone just by looking at them. As they say, looks are deceiving. It would help if you took your time, let this person give you a chance to know them, and be there as an open book ready to accept them.
A lifelong partner cannot be found while you sit around and wait. You have to move, change your surroundings, get out of your comfort zone and stay true to yourself. There are a few places where one could meet a single guy or lady. Such places are social gatherings like house parties organized by friends and family, church meetings, school if you are still a student. Otherwise, I feel sad for those who didn’t find anyone after college, and life is hard out there.
Even if things go badly, see dating as a fun experience- an adventure.
When I met my wife, I wasn’t looking for anything serious, and then it turned into something serious. Dating should not be looked at as a 5-9 job. Let it be fun, and let everything else flow on its own. Once you do that, you will realize that even the “not so good” girls have something beautiful to offer that stays with you, in love or not.
Find something to take away from every single person you meet
Every person Is different in their character. Just because things didn’t work out with someone does not make them horrible people. Try to pick a good out of them and stick with it.
Force yourself to approach people
Dating and looking for someone to spend your life with calls for you to get out of the box and search for what you are looking for because the best partner won’t be handed to you. You have to do the work, most of which means going out to fish, you have to go out there and meet people, big things didn’t start big.
Put up a profile on online dating sites and apps like Tinder, OkCupid, MeetMindful and even Grindr.
Looking for a single man or woman to date, online options are not a bad idea, all you have to do is be confident and real with yourself, you could even try googling how to meet single men/ladies so that you have an idea of what could be out there. AS you try to go the millennial way of dating, don’t forget that there could be fraudsters out there, so keep your mind alert and open.
Learn to laugh about some of the experiences you are having. Laugh with yourself for the blunders you make.
Life should not be taken so seriously all the time, even when things are at their worst. Learn to laugh about it, learn to be open enough to find humor in situations.
All in all, finding the “one” is not a subject where you need to take a course for it. All you need to do is be open enough to let your guard down, love yourself in the process, and learn to find humor in the worst of situations. Do not forget to always have a watchful eye as you do that because not everyone you will meet along the way will have good intentions. Some will only come for material reasons, others for their selfish reasons. That’s why always take a step back and try to analyze situations in front of you.
At the end of the day, when you find the one, all the small talk you had, in the beginning, won’t matter, and guess what? You will know when you see her.
So yes, the journey may be extended and daunting, but the result of it is a lifetime with someone worth the trouble. It’s for this reason that you enjoy the journey too.