League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: The Beach Edition

    There are many things that make or break a gentleman, and beach environments put them all to a serious test. Indeed, beaches often resemble fashions catwalks, just with less clothes and more naked bodies. Well, a true man has to be a class act. Instead of bringing sand to the beach, he brings a swell style and substance. A man wears his gentleman’s demeanor like a second skin and his swimsuit fits him like a glove. Keep that in mind as you dip your toes in pristine white sand and turquoise waters.  

    Entering the stageGentleman on the beach

    One thing is for certain. You cannot be the dude in the T-shirt. Then again, I sincerely hope you have been busy working
    out. You have to bring your swimsuit up to coat. Alas, Speedos are not the best choice, unless you look like a model. Also, below the knee is not for everyone, and baggy shorts are certainly not the right fit for a gentleman. Know what suits you best and do not go out of your league.

    Furthermore, a clean-cut face is no longer the trademark of a distinguished gentleman. Beards are the new black and you have to make certain not a hair is out of place. Although studies suggest that women still prefer clean-shaven men, you are not just any man, are you? Use electric beard trimmers to create a manicured lawn and deliver finishing touches with a double safety razor and beard oil.

    Base of operations

    Looks, of course, are not everything. Remember that handsome is as handsome does. After all, you are not going to just peacock around and stare at the saltwater horizon: be a man with a mission. First off, pick the perfect spot. Mark your territory and know that a real gentleman invests time and money in his tools. And I do not just mean basic equipment like sunscreen, sunglasses, and a towel.  

    Invest in a nice cooler. Coleman is my personal favorite, although there are other noteworthy brands out there. Bear in mind that beach beers are crisps and lightweight and do not come in bottles. A chilled cocktail can also do the trick and if you mean to handle a hot lady, a cool bottle of rose will come in handy. As for the food, it should be something refreshing and classy. Think in terms of slabs of cheese, bags of grapes, and cold salads.

    When it comes to music, it is optional. However, if you go down that road, try to keep it all sun and surf. Tastes differ, but I would not recommend the Beach Boys or extreme tunes such as heavy metal. Weezer’s Island in the Sun, for example, is a nice tune which echoes the theme. The one thing you want to avoid is a shabby speaker. Emit wireless music bliss with a killer device such as the Logitech UE Boom.  

    Test the waters

    man walking on beach with surfboard

    Next, it is time to engage in some fun and entertainment. The more you mean to do, the less alcohol you should consume. There is a variety of activities you can take on, from soccer ball juggling and Frisbee, to volleyball and snorkeling. In any regard, beach sports are more about finesse than brute force. Surfers always turn some heads and brands like Natural Necessity offer everything a surfer could ever need.

    In case hitting the waves is not an option, note that when in the water, you should at least do some real swimming. And if you float, do it with style: on a float with a beer in your hand. Watch out for children and help people out of the water. Take a nap after a burst of activity and melt the stress away. After you wake up, women will line up asking you to apply sunscreen to their backs.

    Some like it hot

    A true man comes prepared and looks like a million dollars. He is as cool as Antarctica ice and hotter than an erupting volcano. You might not be the only pebble on the beach, but be unique and true to the principles of extraordinary gentlemen. Have all eyes on you and be tomorrow’s trendsetter today. Display your sports skills and leave the audience enthralled. Just do not forget to enjoy yourself and have a whale of a time.  


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